I Heart Gene Simmons

Is it just me or is Gene Simmons : Family Jewels hilarious? Gene Simmons is the consumate straight man. He got the show because he's Gene Simmons. He kept the show because his family is endearing, stand up comedians in their own right, and very interesting in different ways. Gene is the squarest rock star you ever want to meet. The only thing that is rock star about him is lust for sex, and he's been having sex with the same woman for the past 20 years. He doesn't drink. He doesn't do drugs. Nor has he ever. The only thing he is addicted to is work and making money. Shannon Tweed is always trying to pull one over on stodgy Gene. Shannon's sister Tracey is crazy in a fun way. His son is cute. His daughter is gorgeous and smart. They're just a normal family. They're no Osbournes. The kids won't grow up to have eating disorders and have multiple stints in rehabs. You want the Simmons to be your neighbors and your friends. There is no fear that Shannon will chuck a ham at you. Its just a good clean fun time.

Madonna : Too Old?

Madonna can't even sell out L.A.? Is the Material Girl's reign coming to an end? Is she getting too old to do stadium? Janet is still doing stadium. So are the Rolling Stones and Sting. So, age isn't really a factor. I guess hotness is. But Madonna hasn't really failed to deliver since the mid-90s when she was donning gold teeth and trying to have Dennis Rodman's mocha chocolatta babies. So, what's going on with tickets sales? Is it the economy? That gas is $50 a tank full at minimum. I'm currently paying $63 for regular unleaded. That natural gas and electric utilities are up 10% -- which is alot when you factor in that the temperature isn't going down, but going up. Last Week in LA it was 115 degrees and we haven't even hit July & August. That's Las Vegas, Phoenix weather not Los Angeles. Food prices are up too, anything with corn in it (which is everything check your labels) is up. Eggs and milk are up. Milk is $8 in Hawaii. Something's got to give. Now, you know I love me a good concert, but that's an extraneous cost. When its costing me $150/week just to live, drive to work, and eat (and I don't mean high off the hog, either), do I have $150 to spend on a 50 year old writhing around in a spandex leotard, some fishnets and platform shoes (that includes Gene Simmons)? Um, no, I don't.

Oh yeah, 50 is too old to dress like a street walker. Wait, what is Cher wearing these days? Never mind.