You are too damn old to be a Gangster

You are too damn old to be a gangster. You have got to be kidding. You've been thugging what 20-25 years now? Its time to hang up the gat for a laptop or a golf club or a damn newspaper. Move your stupid ass out of the hood. Take care of your kids and use a damn condom so you won't have another one you can't afford. Take them Bebe's kids to a ballgame or a the museum or shit, to school. Go back to school your damn self. Dumb is not cute. Get a legal job. One where getting shot isn't an occupational hazard. Look for some upward mobility. Pay your bills. Take that grill out your damn mouth and brush your stanking ass teeth. Trade in them jerzees and white Ts for some real damn clothes. Sell them dumb ass 50K rims on that 98 dodge neon and buy you a volvo. Move your lazy ass out of your mama's house. You are not gangster. You are an idiot. You are fucking 40. Grow the hell up. Damn it.

Natalie Portman is Gangsta, Bitch!

With all of these 25 worst rappers of all time lists floating around from people who are no more qualified to nominee anyone let alone judge the people they deem to be on it, I just want to take a step back to give credit where credit is due. Natalie Portman is gangta, bitch!! If you haven't seen the SNL skit of Natalie gangster rapping, youtube or hulu that shit. It's hilarious and I totally believe the delivery. Adam Sandberg tries to chime in with a weak ass chorus too late into the song, but other than that this performance is stellar. Who knew killing dogs for fun could sound so gangster? Michael Vick, but who else? Check it out.

http://www.hulu.com/watch/1404/saturday-night-live-snl-digital-short-natalie-raps